Okay, first watch this ad for KFC, then continue reading:
Last night, after a day of rehearsals, bumping in to the Northcote Town Hall so we're ready for tomorrow's first 'Wizards of Aus' show, and doing a show in Wantirna, I stopped off at the Boronia KFC to grab a quick something hot to eat. I chose a Twister Meal Deal.
The drink was fine, the chips were okay, but when I bit into the Twister I actually tasted ice.
At first I thought they took "Iceberg Lettuce" way too seriously, but on closer examination I discovered it was actually the "chicken" fillet that was icy cold.
Now as you just heard the cook from KFC say, on national TV, "our chicken is delivered fresh, not frozen" so I have no idea how an otherwised cooked fillet could actually be covered in tiny particles of ice.
Perhaps, if we were to assume the KFC people were getting "creative" with the words "not frozen" and instead actually meant "frozen", then perhaps I could explain what happened: The cook put the fillet in the microwave, thought he or she had pressed the button but hadn't, waited the prerequisite seconds for the piece to heat up, the slopped it straight into the delicately assembled Twister.
I can accept that KFC cooks might find the task of pushing a button somewhat challenging. I can accept that, to their trained hands, a frozen fillet probably feels the same as a hot one...
But KFC "delicers their chicken fresh, not frozen" so how on earth was I lucky enough to get a meal that had the bonus effect of being an icy chicken flavoured dessert wrapped in salad?